A Strange Kind of Empty
This is from a blog I wrote after the death of my father.
November 23, 2018
It’s been a while since I posted anything here. Life just seemed to get in the way. But something happened a few weeks ago that changed my world forever. My father died. I’ve always tried to run to other people’s emergencies and I’ve always tried to have some word of comfort in their time of need. But on November 10th, I found myself on the other side of that need. I was the one at a loss for words. I was the one hurting and not sure what to do. It seemed so surreal sitting there waiting for the funeral director to come and get dad’s body. I felt like, well, I’m not real sure what I felt like. I was empty and I had no one to give encouragement to.
The next few days were filled with activity and preparations for dad’s funeral. I had already committed to doing his service. No one knew my dad like me. We worked together, fought against each other, and stood for each other. And even though we had our differences, I loved him and I knew he loved me. So what was I going to say on his behalf? I needed scripture. I needed help. My wife and children were my rescue (my children did an amazing job speaking on behalf of their grandfather). My friends were my rescue. My mother and my sister were my rescue. We were all hurting but we all had each other as well as our faith that God would bring us through this unreal event. And I’m so very grateful for the number of church family that stepped up and on our behalf! My church family rocked!!
Scripture. It’s my deepest source of strength. I found myself turning to God’s Word for encouragement and support. And God did not dissappoint. He never does. I found myself reading verses with new eyes. Now I was reading from a hurting soul that longed for one more word with his dad. But God gave me His words instead. Words I needed to hear to encourage myself and those I love.
We got through the funeral and all the things that follow. Now we move forward. Because moving forward is what we have to do. I want to say thanks to everyone that made our family feel so special during this difficult time. You all will never know what you mean to us. We are loved and we know it. You are loved as well. We love you all.